Downstairs
<a href="http://myfirstearthquake.bandcamp.com/album/downstairs">Cool in the Cool Way by My First Earthquake</a>

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Lyrics

Cool in the Cool Way

I got a problem that I don't so easily admit
when it comes to going downstairs and making it quick
there's a fight between my feet and the floor
slow stepping settles the score
I can't be compared
without mentioning old ladies
I can't be compared
without mentioning old ladies holding babies

[chorus]
Had a fantasy about dark socks
Had a cup of tea, thought earl grey rocks
All of this leads me here to say
I'm not cool enough in the cool way.

Just around the time that the slap bracelet trend ended
Found out I had amended
My own list of phobias
I got a textbook version from my forearms to fists
That's right, I can't look at my wrists
I can not look at yours either
If I do, my facial color leaves
So have some courtesy and keep it in your sleeve

[chorus]

Am I a dork? I have a robot name (x3)
Like I care. Call me it just the same.
Am I a dork? I have a robot name (x3)
Like I care. Call me it just the same.

[chorus]

Clean Clean

I only liked you for your thighs
I never stopped to realize
there was something between them

I don't mind to compromise
when it comes down to your size
of sweater

[chorus]
Clean, clean! I got to keep it clean
Clean, clean! Clean up that wet dream.
Oh, I'll get the scrubbers going
You get the mop flowing
And we'll got at it, oh!

I hope that you don't mind
That key that you gave me in kind
I'm treating it like it's mine.

[chorus]

I want to be your kitchen slave
Longing only to shave your parmesan

My girl, my gun, she's the one with the son,
banging pots in the kitchen.
My girl, my gun, she's the one with the son.

I can also trim your lawn and when this song is done
I can trim you too.

[chorus]

Mad Tight

Shake your booty like you know you wanna make it
Cause you know you make it hot
And you know you make a lotta friends in the kitchen
The booty's got its own addition
Bring your Shatner, I'll bring my Schroeder
Have ourselves some hot disorder
Disorder washed ashore again.
Disorder washed to order and...

[Chorus]
Yeah, yeah
That dress is mad tight
I can not feel my hips but I feel its spite
Yeah, yeah
That dress is mad tight
It's mad at me because I left it in the dryer too long.

Ok, ok, you wanna play it that
Ok, ok you wanna play it that wa wa wa way.
Way, way, ok!

[Chorus]

Looking at the rear mirror sideways Looking at the side mirror my ways It's an insatiable ratio In fact it's untastable Untastable, in fact it's in insatiable Insatible for explosions Insatible for...

[Chorus]

Outta the Band

I went to the bathroom
Just to check my hair
During practice for a band
I joined on a dare
When I came back small heart attack
Form the note on the door
It said no girls allowed
Go home. We don't want you no more

[Chorus]
Does it mean that I'm outta the band again
Does it mean I'm walking home alone?

Through the tenderloin alone
Knew that I would never get that boob job that you wanted me to
Knew it was the final straw, wouldn't hold the lollipop at the photo shoot last week
Well, I have found a better band, one that don't require men
All our songs are about the body politic
Most of them are covers
And we practice in the suburbs
And we all have multiple lovers and we're called the Beckies

[Chorus]

Sweet Frown

I swear I dreamed you up last week and when I found your image tweaked
I said can't we just get along

An undone song tags along
Shoed in Keds, flees your head
Incomplete half-formed feet
Leaves your lips, leather nips

I swear I found you at my fingertips,
thinking this was something that shouldn't be wrong

Smiling strong, front tooth gone
Crooked grill, window sill
Holds a plant, baskets can't
Deemed unpure, fishing lure

I swear I thought we met before,
I heard a ring you knocked my door
And now I know which way to go, dear.

I swear we kissed at parties past.
You winked at me. I pinched your ass
And now I know which class you are, dear.

I think I dreamed my bedroom clean
But when I woke, the trash had teamed
I thought can't we just get along?

Run the seams, smile-sent beams
Light the way, trust no ray
Pay for paved, play it saved
Films get clipped, waiters tipped.

I think I found you using q-tips
thinking this was something that shouldn't be wrong

Fingers ring, words slurring
Real life twice, gambler's dice
Motor bikes, poor man's dyke
Anti-leak, parrot's beak.

I think I sinked three ships last week,
I burnt a bridge and climbed a peak
And now I know, how not to make friends

I think I called your girlfriend fat and stole a song from Ratatat
And now I know what lawsuits feel like

[Chorus] Ain't nothing but a little bite of sugar
Can make these words go down
Ain't nothing but a little bite of sugar
Will make it sweet to taste this frown

I feel I dream I screwed the team
but when I woke, my cleats were clean
I thought, I did it just for the song

Clothes breed rips, babes from hips
Blamed too much, bought for touch
Bear-like back, sweaters lack
Threadbare kiss, part-time bliss.

I feel the kiss was the right dismiss
but there's always nothing you read straight wrong.

All done song, tags along
Not questioned, tests done run
Chorus tossed, lyrics lost
Comprehend, at the end.

I feel I've been a naughty friend
I robbed your coat and stole your pen
And now I know what karma writes like

I feel the sand beneath my toes
The hours pass, the tension grows
And now I know why day trips take long.

[Chorus]

Vow to Vowels

Your grandmother clips them from the gazette
Piles them by day and Sunday throws out
Your skill with that paper impress to no end
Your skill and resistance I can't comprehend
I never wonder which ones you'll leave blank
All will be filled once you empty your think tank

A I to O, 6 more to go-o-o
A I to O, 5 more to go that you probably know-o -o

[Chorus]
A E I O U, I'm going to use some
I O U some more, I'm going to lose some
I made a vow to vowels, I'm going to use some
I made a vow to vowels, I'm going to lose some

Filling in crosswords won't make you Walt Mossberg
But that daily lust will prevent aging rust
Later the day, the longer it takes
But everyone knows Will Shortz wants it take way
Your vocab expanding, your spelling outstanding
The man of my dreams has a grammar PhD

A I to O, 4 more to go-o-o
A I to O, 3 more to go that you probably know-o -o

[Chorus]

O U. If I can't have U,
I don't want to, have no other letter.

[Chorus]

In the Forest with Frenemies

It's autumn
In the best place that I've ever lived
It's the fall
in the place where I have always lived
It smells a little bit smoky
but what do you expect from dead leaves.
It is so colorful, so bright, so overbearing
That the bears can't handle it.

[Chorus] Camouflage from your enemies
Making nice with your frenemies
In the forest, there are politics
But there are also matchsticks

We invite
all the nice woodland creatures
My family
All 500 siblings
And the bunnies in the next hole
We invite the squirrels
But they invite the raccoons
Who invite the deer
And the wild turkey will be here soon.

[Chorus]

Bear solo

Bang
Flash boom bang
Bet you didn't know I knew how to start a bonfire
They teach us more than cricket kabobs
At that chipmunk camp of mine
Now we're going to see
How the forest looks as stumps
Now we're going to know
How the big guys get eaten for lunch.

Radio

Saturday in the way of life
Precious moments of the week
get lost when weekends get the toss
The project train can get derailed.
Work is forced to take the stairs.
Filling in your timesheet with a relaxed frequency.
A relaxed frequency (x3)

I always was told as a child
They should put you on the radio
So we can, we can turn you off

It's the May, in a way,
it's the May of life
Fill your cup with high frequency eruptions
to your ears, nose, bites, lobes
Fridays between us
Days go,
Earlobes sideways between us goes the sound
Goes the sound...wa wound (x3)

[Chorus]

A relaxed frequency
A relapsed frequency

[Chorus]

Meat Pies

I got a new recipe
Wanna come over?
It calls for a lot of ingredients
Also for you

I got a big pot
It's boiling way so hot
Opps, you fell in
Now you're cooking
I think I'll add a couple
more ingredients and
let you simmer for an hour or two.

[Chorus]
I got my wheat flour, got my sifter, got my meat grinder, Mister
I got my oven got my dismount, non-stick on discount
Gonna make a surprise out of plus-size guys
Take those thighs, make meat pies

A cup of sugar
Three bowls of flour
A pinch of salt
Un Dorito
Some Dr. Pepper
Last night's lasagna
Oh baby, And you!

[Chorus]

At your funeral
At least what they are calling your funeral
They can not find your body. Cause I ate it
I met your brother. He's kinda cute.
A little chubby but cute. Just like you were.
I think I might have him over for making some meat pies too

[Chorus]

Sleep in the Sea

Oh sailor, lean back
You came off the ship looking way too hip
In your tight white pants and your navy blue bibs
Into your arms you took the first girl you eyed
She melted as Dad welled with pride

Why didn't you look under the dock
I found a frothy spot there where I hoped we could talk
I wore my mother of pearl and I thought we could get serious

[Chorus]
The wetter we be, the better we be
The better we be, the wetter we be
We sleep in the sea, it's all fine with me
The wetter we be, the better we be

Oh pirate, pay up
You're the only one-legged man I know
To whom else would I sell these wooden toes
But your parrot goes mute at the offer of substitute

[Chorus]

Oh coast guard, be kind
You were first in your class so you thought you had passed
But the truth is the wind filing up your masts
Is just hot air and emergency flares
So don't be surprised if your shipmates don't care

Press Mentions

“My First Earthquake has instantly jumped to the front of my playlist and has the talent and emotional mix to remain in the top spot. I could not recommend picking up this album with any more insistence. It’s not a question of if they will be a break-out success, but when.” - College News

“On their new album 'Downstairs' My First Earthquake capture the sheer likeability of Metric, the sassy cheek of Blondie and the raving pop of New Young Pony Club, infusing their tunes with more savvy than an Harvard lawyer and the edginess of afternoon tea with the Taliban.” -The Devil Has The Best Tuna

“Downstairs is a display of the do-it-yourself spirit culminated. A notable track on the album is “Vow to Vowels.” With its catchy dance rhythm, organ melody, driving bass, and infectious vocals, one can’t help but get out their seat and shake it a little (or a lot)…The whole album treks across the landscape of tight-synth induced dance pop, making a promise out of the four musicians abilities as a group.” - The Bay Bridged

Credits

Downstairs, My First Earthquake's first full-length album, is a collection of 10 electro / indie rock songs.

You might like it if you're a fan of Metric, The Ting Tings, New Young Pony Club, Ladyhawke, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, and Blondie.

Produced by the fantastically-talented Anthony Molina of Mercury Rev. Released June 20, 2009.

Contact:

Check out the rest of myfirstearthquake.com

Credits
  • Rebecca Bortman - vocals & lyrics
  • Chad Thornton - keyboard, bass, vocals
  • David Lean - guitar, keyboard, bass, vocals
  • Andre Salcido - drums

Recorded at The Gold Mine in Oakland, CA. Produced by Anthony Molina. Mastered by Carl Saff. Cover art by Rebecca Bortman. Photography by Agata Kamler and Braden Kowitz.

Thanks

Anthony Molina (for producing our sound), Sarah and Kyle Cooper (for the recording space and fermented treats), Carin Rogoff & Tammy Chang (for merch-ing), Eric Slatkin (for the 280K views), Agata Kamler (for the snaps), Mike Monteiro and Erika Hall (for the photo studio), Heather, Carlton, Maggie, for our fans as far away as New Zealand, and for the earthquake during our first practice (for being memorable, but not too scary).